So much of my* philosophy is based on the idea that the root of so much of our suffering -personally and collectively, psychologically and politically – is how much of our identity we imbue into our egos. The issue is not with the existence of the ego itself, which is the fruit of the evolution of consciousness, but it is the ego pulled out of its natural context – severed from its roots in our true nature that is beyond ego.
While discussions of the “ego” and “our true nature” can feel esoteric and abstract, I find practical resonance with these ideas in our direct somatic experience.
How does my experiential field differ when I am identified in my ego vs. when my ego is in right relation?
To me, identification with the ego is a tension, a bracing around a localized point in my body, usually within my head. Other times, when I’m triggered interpersonally, this bracing point may be felt in my diaphragm. Most often, the defining characteristic of this ego-centric experience is a tightening, bunching, bracing against.
Not only is this state of being -of bracing against -common in our world today, I’d say it is the foundation of our modern culture. In order to keep up and manage in the fast-paced, loud, artificially bright, hard, isolating and endlessly exploitative matrix of modernity, the ego has become the default position of minimal vulnerability and maximum productivity.
And our culture is such that most people do not even know an alternative orientation of consciousness exists.
But even for those of us who know and have experienced consciousness outside of the ego-centric state, we know that being alive in the world today means that these alternatives need to be cultivated regularly to counteract the inertia of the cultural matrix.
Hence the emphasis in all spiritual traditions of daily practice, ritual and emphasis on Remembrance (of our true state). These actions saturate our beings, perceptions and thinking in a different worldview – in a sense bathing and protecting us from taking the current status quo as the norm.
I’d like to offer some of the ways of reorienting from ego-centric state to a more wholistic, field-like state of Presence that I return to (when I inevitably find myself caught up in my head too much). To those who have a regular religious or spiritual practice, these may be very familiar for the reasons touched on above.
3 points to remember about releasing from the ego’s hold… 1. Do not expect any of these or other steps to result in complete release. The inertia of identifying with ego has quiet a kinetic momentum. Cultivating a few degrees of softness of the ego’s bracing is putting the seeds of reorientation into motion. Be patient with planting seeds, but know that the more regularly you plant the seeds, the sooner they come to fruition. 2. The ego being quiet and non-frantic is not a precondition of accessing a state beyond the ego. In fact, the content of the ego has nothing to do with what state of being you can access, in the same way that clouds in the sky have no effect on the existence of sky. Expect that the ego will persist in its monologuing and bracing throughout these or any techniques and do not let that dishearten your practice. 3. Resisting the ego is an activity of the ego, and therefore perpetuates the ego. Resisting the ego keeps the ego as the main character of your experience. Allow the ego to exist as it is, just decenter it as the object of your attention.
- Contextualizing Heuristics
This is the most important and fundamental step for me, which is: remembering that there is a state of being beyond the ego-centric one, and its never farther than one perceptual shift away. Its crazy how easy it is to forget this, even if you identify as a very “spiritual” person.
The purpose of this step is to point out that sometimes, remembering that an alternative exists is itself a potent way to access that alternative. This is especially true in the context of working with the over-inflated ego, which maintains its authority by convincing us that there are no alternatives. Remembering that a lot of what the ego deems as existential death, is actually its own death and our own liberation from it, helps depotentiate its power.
There’s infinite ways to language what the nature of this “other” (more natural, and holistic) state of consciousness is like. Here’s an attempt from my language:
ego is a tiny sliver of the field of consciousness which is ever-present in any experience as long (at least) as you are alive. The field of consciousness is the fabric of any experience you are having, with all the seemingly definite “parts” of experience (like the ego, self, identity, resistance, bracing) being manifestations of this fabric. Its like bunched up different parts of a bed sheet into more concentrated clumps – ultimately its all sheet. The unbound experiential field just is -whether you are conscious of it or not. Just this remembrance alone can help loosen some of the existential tightness of performing the ego for too long.
Another, more poetic description of the difference of ego-consciousness vs. field consciousness: Here
Disclaimer: I think the efficacy of this step is directly related to how much somatic memory you have of states beyond the ego, which can only be cultivated through experience. We all have somatic memory of the expansive field of Presence because we all have been children. Can you remember a glimmer of what it was like for experience to be totally OPEN? Before all the categories of self-consciousness divvy upped our experience, there was a bright, vibrant wholeness to our experience of the world. Its ok if you can’t fully consciously remember that state.
2. Somatic cues
a. While you’re reading this, curl one hand up into a tight fist. Feel this concentrated ball of sensation. bring your attention to the tension, the sustained effort to maintain the action. Now, and here’s the key, pay very close attention to the experience of releasing the fist. Mindfully experience release. Allow the concentrated sensations to disperse.
Can we move that feeling of release to the feeling of concentrated sensation you feel identified with in your body/head? Try it for a few moments. Do not expect full release, but even a few degrees of softness is effective and putting the seeds of reorientation into motion.
b. I find that any meditation that requires maintaining awareness of two sides of my body at once helps pull me out of the ego’s one-pointedness almost immediately. Example:
- imagine two dots, each just an inch or so above each shoulder. Keep your awareness on both these points at once. Let the tension of “holding up your head” melt.
can move these two dots to any height in the body, as long as they’re on opposite sides. holding them at my hips while i sit is very effective for embodiment as well.
3. Nature
Being in nature is our true nature. nature is our true nature. just communing with nature for 20 minutes is medicine and reconnection to family.
4. “Other”-orientation
Help someone else. Go for a walk with a friend. Volunteer. Literally get outside of yourself.
5. Moving Slowly
Whether its Tai Chi, yoga, or (my preference) just slow non-productive intuitive movement, this is sometimes the quickest way for me to access embodied Presence. Oftentimes, especially when its new, the ego hates this. it shouts. it actually sometimes feels like it may die if you continue going so slow any longer. remind yourself of the relief, of the important existential recontextualization that is just on the other side of allowing this part of you to die. And relish in the subtle, quiet, scrumptious, luxurious, velvety experience of engaging with experience outside the whirlwind immediacy and urgency of the ego.
To further explore the psychosomatics of change, explore How to Get out of a Rut .